Thursday, September 4, 2008

but what if...

Without a doubt every time i use the bathroom i check behind the shower curtain as if i believe that there is someone there. I cant help it. If i dont ill have major anxiety while im in there. So what if...just what if one time i look behind that dreaded shower curtain and there was a man staring back at me. What the fuck would i really do? Am i ready for that? No. So why do i keep checking? If that same dude jumped at me while i looked id be screwed for the simple fact ill most likely be sitting on the toilet. How can i run with my pants around my legs and you all know me and the clumsiness. So id die in the bathroom with my pants around my ankles. yay.
Or what if im in the mirror doing my hair and i see someone peeking from the top of the shower curtain. What the fuck would i really do? Run. How fast can you run from someone thats directly behind you?
Ok so what if...
i looked behind the horrid shower curtain and theres a little gnome sitting with a cup of tea. or. A Kafuckinbillion spiders. or. A heroin addict shooting up. or. A newborn baby. or. a dead guy. or. nothing. Theres always nothing. But my point is shit...what do i expect to be there? and why the fuck can i NOT check it and be ok.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

good luck with that

Anonymous said...

Why not just leave the shower curtain open? Then you always know that it is open. Just in case you come home and it is closed you know something is out of placed. I really wouldn't be to worried though because most people who break into house, get the shit and get out. If someone is still in the process of stealing most likely just blitz towards the exit.

elle vee said...

the shower curtain staying open might help out. im not worried about being robbed. not really sure of what im worried about but fuck it.