Friday, January 16, 2009

you did wha?!?

fyi. this is did what?? face. yup
Day 3. The real testing begins. 
My alarms jerks me awake. Snooze. Once again the dreaded alarm wrenches me from my warm sheets. I sit up, stretch and prepare for my day. With no time for breakfast i rush along with my daily routine. Brush, Spit. Brush, Spray. Application of makeup. Spray once more. I head out the door. Smokes, non-working phone, and very little cash in hand (clothing optional). I greet the outside with foggy breath and an immediate frosted nose in hopes my car will abnormally heat up quickly. I drive. No far But i drive. 
Once i get to the human testing location(insert random company here) i rush in from the cold. I'm met with warm cynical smiles. Like these people are going to be testing on me...the smile can not be genuine.
I sit in an awkward style chair that leans forward with no back rest. "Relax", she says. My shirt is drawn up on my back. The tracing begins. I can not see but i feel a marker gliding across my back making shapes. Its learn how to draw shapes day, didn't you know.
Done. I then feel some kind of cold lotion like substance being rubbed in these shapes that i still haven't seen. Next shape a new substance. Repeat. 
Now i sit. I should have been advised to bring some kind of reading material saying i was sitting there motionless for an hour and a half. But no. 
Sit still. Click. You can move. Sit still. Click. You may move. They shined a light onto these shapes on my back. Next shape different light. Next..and so on.
I sat motionless, staring off into space thinking what the fuck have i done that i have to do this for money. I listen to peoples conversations, "Med school this...Med school that. Drinking coffee with bird poop in it. Meeting new guys but not knowing there names." I could write a book just from there random stories.
It didn't hurt. Just the sitting was uncomfortable. I had maybe a half hour left and the chick that has been shining these lights on me asks me a question, "Do you want a magazine or something to read?" What? Is this bitch serious? I have been here staring into space, playing with my hands, fidgeting with my NON-IN-SERVICE phone for the past hour and you want to ask if i want some kind of reading material. Hahaha. I say no and go back to space.
My time was up. The wiped the cream off me and ordered for me to come back tomorrow for the results to be checked. That's when i will receive my money.  I walk out 10 to four leaving me only 10 minutes to get to my real job about 15-20 minutes away. Excellent. 
End of day 3. My back has marker all over it. AND little red sunburn marks too. Yay!! The things we do just to stay alive!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Your crazy.